Remembering Bootsie at Charley’s Restaurant & Club

I first met Bootsie less than a year ago at a ladies’ getaway weekend at nearby Lake Norman. My friend Linda, who invited me, always spoke of how much she loved her sister Bootsie and how much fun they had together. Well, I love to have fun, so I didn’t hesitate to accept the invitation.

We lounged by the lake, ate together, exercised, shared our stories, and laughed a lot. Whenever Bootsie shared an insight or a story, I was all ears. She was a great storyteller, witty and so funny! She had me in belly laughs so many times that my sides hurt the next day.

   

During the weekend, Bootsie spent lots of time in the kitchen cooking for us. That’s when I tasted one of her signature dishes, the best Macaroni and Cheese in the South! I came away from that weekend feeling like I had known Bootsie my whole life.

The past few birthdays, I’ve been struggling with the shock of turning 50. I’ve been totally caught up in the transitions of an empty nest, menopause, downsizing, and life reinvention. But after attending Bootsie’s funeral last week, my complaining has been silenced. I was sobered by the fact that she won’t be here in her 50s. Cancer cut her down in the prime of life at age 49.

So I’ve decided to replace my complaining with gratitude. I need to be grateful for an empty nest, even if it’s lonely at times; grateful for menopause and all of its 7 dwarfs; grateful for letting go of a huge home and 2/3 of my possessions to live in a smaller, simpler abode; and grateful for the opportunity to reinvent myself and create a wonderful future.

According to Bootsie’s instructions, her  Memorial Celebration  was to be held at Charley’s Restaurant & Club rather than in a church or funeral home. And a Celebration of Life it was!!! With over 400 people, there was standing room only, with an overflow on the sidewalk outside. There were young people, old people, wealthy people, country folk, city folk, business people and bikers. Bootsie clearly had touched a lot of people during her lifetime.

Charley's Restaurant & Club - Gastonia, NC - Night Club | Facebook

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Her loved ones described her as being a straight shooter with a heart of gold, willing to give you the shirt off her back. She was portrayed as a unique blend of the southern cook Paula Dean, the witty Roseanne Barr, the sassy Madea, and the mischievous Elvira. She loved handing out advice and pearls of wisdom, often to complete strangers she met in the nightclubs where her husband, “Buddy Love,” worked as a DJ.

Buddy Love | Facebook

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Funerals make us face our own mortality. After the slide show and Eulogy, the Memorial Celebration  concluded with the release of helium-filled balloons outside, a fitting picture of letting go of our loved ones when we say good-bye.

Although I hadn’t known Bootsie for very long, the memories will last forever. I want to impact people’s lives like she did. Our loss truly is heaven’s gain.