Tornadoes hardly ever strike Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. So that was the last thing we expected when we decided to spend the Fourth of July weekend there in 2001, along with nearly 400,000 other unsuspecting vacationers.
My son Ben, 9 years old at the time, was on the beach with some neighbor friends who were vacationing with us. Feeling safe in the family-friendly atmosphere, we lost sight of the boys, who ended up a considerable distance away by the time we saw the lightning.
Everyone assumed this would be a brief afternoon thunderstorm. No big deal, we thought.
But then the sky became eerily grey. And the winds intensified. Dust and debris swirled all around us. Beach chairs spun in the air. Lifeguards quickly evacuated the beach.
But there was still no sign of Ben or his friends.
Meanwhile, this vicious funnel of destruction ravaged a two-mile path along the beach, knocking over buses and utility poles, damaging roofs, and blowing out windows in buildings and vehicles. I later learned that 400,000 Myrtle Beach homes were left without power in the aftermath of its 157 mile-an-hour winds.
Just as the danger reached its pinnacle, some lifeguards arrived in their pickup truck with Ben’s friends—but without Ben. When I learned the boys had been separated and had no idea what happened to my son, I screamed at the top of my lungs, fearing the worst.
But to my great relief, I discovered later that Ben had found his way back to our room, completely unharmed. He had taken cover right before the tornado winds reach their destructive climax. His safety seemed a miracle, to say the least.
I had been on the fringe of powerful storms before, but this time my family was in the epicenter. The worst damage occurred at the Myrtle Beach Pavilion, right where we had been enjoying our peaceful vacation. I found out later that our minivan had been totaled by the high winds and debris. But that was OK. I just was grateful we all were safe and unharmed.
Storms can be scary, particularly when they come without warning.
This event taught me some important lessons about the storms of life. First, I saw that storms aren’t entirely bad. They have a way of showing us what’s really important. As the Myrtle Beach tornado brought its swirling destruction my way, I realized my van and belongings were of little value in comparison to the safety of my precious son Ben.
I also saw that life’s storms often seem to come “out of nowhere,” when we least expect them. Without warning, blue skies and sunny days can be replaced by dark clouds and torrential rains. So when the storms of life converge against you on every side, look UP! That’s where your help will come from.
What about you?
• Life’s storms can help us see what is truly important in our lives. If you faced a serious tornado, hurricane, flood, earthquake or other natural disaster, what person or possession would be most important for you to keep safe?
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Find A Kindred Spirit
Although most of our friendships are only for a season, I hope you will be fortunate enough to find one or two lifelong friends—people who walk with you throughout the ups and downs of your life journey.
While watching the movie Anne of Green Gables several years ago, I was struck by a statement from Anne Shirley, the main character. Anne referred to her newly found friend, Diana Barry, as a “kindred spirit” and a “bosom friend,” explaining, “My greatest wish...has always been to have a bosom friend, a really kindred spirit. I’ve dreamt of meeting her all my life.” Her statement resonated with my heart. “I want a friend like that, too!”
Some people spend their entire lives searching for such a “kindred spirit.” They crave the closeness Anne had with Diana—a relationship where each could share her heart without fear of rejection. “Bosom friends” like that are rare indeed, but when we meet them, it is such a gift—one of the most fulfilling experiences in life.
Do you have a close friend like this? Often when you meet such a person, it’s as if you’ve known each other your entire lives. They understand you, and you feel safe to be yourself when you’re around them. Sometimes they challenge you and hold you accountable, and at other times they realize you need them to cut you some slack.
You don’t need to walk on eggshells around a bosom friend. You can share on a deep level and tell them what you’re really thinking and feeling. They listen intently, and you come away from every conversation feeling refreshed and affirmed.
True friends know the importance of making “deposits” in each other’s emotional bank accounts. Yes, our kindred friends will sometimes need to make a “withdrawal” from our time and emotional reserves. But that’s OK. They’ve already made deposits and invested themselves into our lives. So it never remains just a one-way street.
Often a kindred spirit will have similar interests, a compatible purpose in life, and enjoyment in the same kinds of activities and adventures. In her book, 10-10-10, Suzy Welch describes this as “sharing the same sensibilities.” Sensibilities are beliefs, goals, and priorities.
But true friends can be hard to find. And Zig Ziglar correctly points out that instead of spending our time looking for a friend, it’s a wiser to focus on BEING a friend: “If you go looking for a friend, you’re going to find they’re very scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you’ll find them everywhere.”
What about you?
Make a list of the traits you value most in a close relationship. Now take a few minutes to ask yourself whether you are demonstrating these characteristics in your current friendships. Note any improvements you need to make in modeling these traits.
While watching the movie Anne of Green Gables several years ago, I was struck by a statement from Anne Shirley, the main character. Anne referred to her newly found friend, Diana Barry, as a “kindred spirit” and a “bosom friend,” explaining, “My greatest wish...has always been to have a bosom friend, a really kindred spirit. I’ve dreamt of meeting her all my life.” Her statement resonated with my heart. “I want a friend like that, too!”
Some people spend their entire lives searching for such a “kindred spirit.” They crave the closeness Anne had with Diana—a relationship where each could share her heart without fear of rejection. “Bosom friends” like that are rare indeed, but when we meet them, it is such a gift—one of the most fulfilling experiences in life.
Do you have a close friend like this? Often when you meet such a person, it’s as if you’ve known each other your entire lives. They understand you, and you feel safe to be yourself when you’re around them. Sometimes they challenge you and hold you accountable, and at other times they realize you need them to cut you some slack.
You don’t need to walk on eggshells around a bosom friend. You can share on a deep level and tell them what you’re really thinking and feeling. They listen intently, and you come away from every conversation feeling refreshed and affirmed.
True friends know the importance of making “deposits” in each other’s emotional bank accounts. Yes, our kindred friends will sometimes need to make a “withdrawal” from our time and emotional reserves. But that’s OK. They’ve already made deposits and invested themselves into our lives. So it never remains just a one-way street.
Often a kindred spirit will have similar interests, a compatible purpose in life, and enjoyment in the same kinds of activities and adventures. In her book, 10-10-10, Suzy Welch describes this as “sharing the same sensibilities.” Sensibilities are beliefs, goals, and priorities.
But true friends can be hard to find. And Zig Ziglar correctly points out that instead of spending our time looking for a friend, it’s a wiser to focus on BEING a friend: “If you go looking for a friend, you’re going to find they’re very scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you’ll find them everywhere.”
What about you?
Make a list of the traits you value most in a close relationship. Now take a few minutes to ask yourself whether you are demonstrating these characteristics in your current friendships. Note any improvements you need to make in modeling these traits.
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