Discover the Secret of Serenity

This month In The Source we are focusing on the Life Area of Rest & Relaxation . I have learned this painful  lesson through the school of hard knocks.

Serenity isn’t something that comes easily to me. On a scale of one to ten, there are times I would probably score a negative five! But I’m learning the secret of serenity, and this famous prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr has helped:

 God grant me

the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

the Courage to change the things I can,

and the Wisdom to know the difference.

 I have found myself reciting this prayer many times during my life, particularly when encountering difficult circumstances that were out of my control to change. On such occasions, it was easy to feel helpless and hopeless; frustrated that there was nothing I could do to alter the situation. Such times can be hard on anyone, but they are especially exasperating to someone like me, who wants to tie up all the loose ends of life!

 We might as well go ahead and face this fact: It’s simply not in our power to change all the things we would like to change. So rather than spinning our wheels in futile effort or continually knocking our heads against a brick wall, we must accept the things we cannot change.

 In the children’s book The Worry Tree, worry is described as a tomato plant who gets so much attention that it sprouts and shoots out of control, producing more tomatoes than anyone knows what to do with. The author encourages children to create a worry box in which to deposit their anxieties. Then, once a day, they open their worry box and share its contents with a trusted adult, who discusses how each concern will be addressed.

 One reason the Serenity Prayer is so effective is that it brings us back to a realization that we are mere mortals. It reminds us that it is the height of arrogance to think we will be able to change unchangeable circumstances by our own human efforts.

 If you are a praying person, you know the power of unloading your burden to One who is all-powerful.

 Not a praying person yet? It often helps to simply write your worries and concerns on a list or in a journal. Just get it off your chest and onto paper. This isn’t magic, but it often can help make you feel less overwhelmed.

 Embrace the freedom that serenity brings. Yes, bad things will happen sometimes. That’s life. It goes with the territory, and sometimes we simply don’t understand why we go through the things we do.

 But as Reinhold Niebuhr concludes: “The final wisdom of life requires not the annulment of incongruity but the achievement of serenity within and above it.” You see, even though questions may remain, serenity enables us to rise above life’s “incongruities.”

 Worrying today won’t make your tomorrow any better. But it may give you more gray hair and wrinkles.

 What about you?

 •             Take time to create two separate lists. On the first list, write down things you cannot change, but simply must accept. On the second list, write down matters you believe can be changed by the proper effort and perseverance.